You are out there, rocking it, rocking it really hard.
You are pecking away at the keyboard everyday working on the new novel. You are showing up in the studio and the new paintings are incredible. You just bought your first round-the-world ticket and Lonely Planet Guides are your new best friend.
Yet, those who you love the most and dearest to you are clueless about what you are doing or the new path you’ve chosen for yourself.
You have an audience who is responding positively to what you are doing. Yet when you look out into the crowd, the faces that are staring back at you with love and encouragement are not those who you’ve studied for final exams with.
Your best friends don’t understand how your new work scares the be-Jesus out of you because it is so far out there. Your family does not read the blog entries you painstakingly craft week after week. You are showing up, but they are not. You feel…dare I say it….abandoned.
It hurts. I won’t lie. It hurts.
Then I am reminded of a Pearl Jam song, “Off He Goes.” During one of their performances, Eddie Vedder introduced the song by talking about how him and the band are hard guys to have relationships with. It’s especially hard for their friends and families as their lives get moving pretty fast.
“We go way back
I wonder about his insides
Its like his thoughts are too big for his size
He’s been taken… where, I don’t know?
Off he goes with his perfectly unkempt hope
And there he goes…
And now I rub my eyes, for he has returned
Seems my preconceptions are what should have been burned
For he still smiles…
And he’s still strong
Nothing’s changed, but the surrounding bullshit that has grown
And now he’s home
And we’re laughing like we always did
My same old, same old friend
Until a quarter-to-ten
I saw the strain creep in
He seems distracted and I know just what is gonna happen next
Before his first step
He’s off again.”
Maybe its not that your friends and loved ones have abandoned you. Maybe you are moving at such a rapid rate that they simply cannot follow along at the same speed.
Is it possible the reluctant support from your best buddies and the lag time in their understanding of your new world is, in part, out of fear? Fear that you are leaving them behind? After all, you are traveling at lightening speed.
You are expanding. Your world is expanding. It is only natural that you are making new friends, fans and supporters who are 110% excited about what you are doing and what you are about. Everything is always in a constant state of change and that includes the role your friends play in your life.
Maybe what matters is that when you return from your great adventures, you can share a bottle of wine, a slice of cake and laugh like you always did, as the same old friends. Maybe what matters is that those who have loved you always are there and are the home you return to.
My thoughts are bigger than my head and I am off again with my unkept hope.
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