The gap in perception and also a story…

I don’t think we fully understand how others perceive us.

But let me tell you a story first.

Long ago, when I was in the 7th grade, I was awkward and introverted. I was still in shock from moving from Taiwan to the US and playing catch up with English as a new language. I didn’t pay attention to boys. I was friends with some of the boys in my class, but I didn’t go out of my way to solicit their attention nor did I really give them much thought.

One day as we waited outside the classroom for the bell to ring and the classroom door to open, a boy, Jonathan, came up to me.

He said that he had something for me. I replied “OK.”

He pulled out a small box that had a gold ID bracelet inside. My name was inscribed on one side of the bracelet and the other side said, “Love Jon.”

Just then, the class bell rang and we went inside.

I don’t recall saying anything to him after class or for the next couple of days. As a matter of fact, I was puzzled. I didn’t understand Jonathan liked me. I didn’t understand why he would give me a gift. I did not perceive myself as a girl a boy would be interested in, and so his overture was a complete surprise to me.

It took me three whole days to put it all together.

In order to fully realize your potential, you need to first understand how others perceive you. If people think you are an idiot, but you think you are the life of the party, there is a misalignment of projection and perception. If people believe that you are an exciting person who creates amazing art, yet you see yourself as a starving artist, again, misalignment of projection and perception.

In order for you to become your authentic self, you need to understand how others perceive you vs. how you see yourself, and close the gap in between. After all, we all want to be seen clearly for who we are and be understood and accepted. The place to start is understanding the gap in perceptions.

Tell about a time when you broke someone’s heart because you didn’t know any better…..

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*Yes, I’ve kept the bracelet all of these years. I am a little sentimental.

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